One thing I have learned in India is that rules (No Smoking, Keep Left, Do Not Grope Tourists) are apparently for other people (I don't know who) and the only way to survive is every man for himself. Alternatively, to let Chris do everything while I looked after the bags and tried to avoid the stares. I didn't enjoy the stares much but apparently it is because I am blonde, despite doing my best to respect the cultural norms of the country and dress in an appropriately modest way.
Mostly we went to a town, got a hotel, checked out the local fort/palace/temple, walked around the market, did whatever people do, and then moved on to the next place. In this way we made it through about six cities in ten days, which was pretty intense and unnecessary. My favourite market was in Jodhpur, where I stepped in an enormous fresh cowpat wearing flipflops, an experience I never wish to repeat. The cows are everywhere, wandering around eating the chappattis people buy for them and then perhaps having a nice sit-down in the middle of a busy street while motorbikes race past at suicidal pace.
We haven't seen any five-legged cows. I am very disappointed, as Chris Weber had led me to believe that they were practically endemic to Rajasthan.
Traffic in India is something else. You see jeeps hurtling down the main roads crammed to the brim with people, with the back door open and six more people hanging on to the outside. We got a taxi a few times and each time I feared for our lives. Taxi drivers are incapable of driving behind anyone or anything, and will sound their horn until whatever it is moves out of the way. This includes other cars, people, camels, and on one memorable occasion, a branch.
The hassle is everywhere. Everyone wants you to come in their shop or travel in their rickshaw and they will not take no for an answer. Chris, normally a model of good manners and calm, actually ended up shouting at one particularly persistent rickshaw guy. Our favourite tout tried to get us to go to his shop to buy some "air conditioned sandals".
Udiapur was one of our favourite places. It was used as a location for the James Bond Octopussy movie, and is a jumble of old streets on the side of a huge lake with two island palaces on it (now hotels). Our hotel was just a Lonely Planet budget place and looked like nothing from the outside, but on the inside was filled with painted murals. Our room had a four poster bed and a tiny balcony, and someone had even painted peacocks on the bathroom (it had an actual bath!) ceiling. One evening we went to a cultural show in a restored Haveli (palace) where they had many types of Indian dancing. Essentially we paid 60 rupees to watch a woman with a pile of bowls on her head, dance on a cake-tin. I kid you not. It was very entertaining, maybe for all the wrong reasons.
Near Udiapur we went to an amazing temple called Ranakpur which had an absolute forest of pillars inside. Our guidebook says 1444 but we didn't count them. They are all made of white marble and no two are alike. Other temples we've visited included the Jagdish temple in Udaipur, where Chris was "attacked" by an "evil looking monkey with beady eyes and fangs" (it took a swipe at him on the steps), the Brahma temple in Pushkar where they extracted a large donation from us in exchange for some good Karma and pointless chanting, and the monkey temple in Varanasi, where we fed the monkeys and tried not to show our fear.
Our last stop in Rajasthan was Jaipur, and coincided with the festival of Holi. This is where Indians get hopped up on a special "religious" drink which is basically yoghurt and weed, and rub coloured powder on each other. We were really looking forward to seeing the celebrations, but unfortunately we both came down with some lurgy and spent the day lying in the hotel watching the cricket, too pathetic to party. Chris went out to the next door shop to buy water, was gone for less than two minutes, and returned covered head to foot in paint. We're much better now and India won the cricket.
The food has generally been good, and of course it's nice for Chris to have plenty of choice as vegetarian restaurants abound. In one place, he ordered a curry which, when it arrived, appeared to be made of twigs. However it turned out to be one of the best things we've tried. If only we could remember the name of it ...
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